Down

Well, I've had sort of a rough day. It hasn't been all bad but I've been feeling down so I'm going to be chilling on the blog posting. I'm kind of tempted to delete it but that could be the hormones talking so I'll wait on that....

ow

Well, M kept me up half the night. It seems like we have one good night and then one bad one. I'll take the good one, thanks. I didn't talk to M's doctor but I talked to the nurse, who talked to the doctor, phew, and the doc thinks it's just Madilyn's neurological systems maturing and that things will get worse next week. yay. I had found out something similar online. M doesn't have traditional colic (thankfully) but she has some things in her system to work out. It peaks around 6 weeks and then disappears by 3 or 4 months.

Here's hoping.

In other news, I'm taking Madilyn to get some photos done Thursday morning. I don't know if I'll want to be in them or not. I'm pretty rough looking. (shut up, pedro). We can take family pictures later. I want to get some nice pics for M's birth announcements. I know I did Lily's myself but I don't feel like I have that kind of time or energy right now. :P

And how cool is this? Come on, say it outloud "Toulouse goose". :)

Trying

I'm not really sure what to write. I'm tired and worried about Madilyn. She's healthy but the sleep thing. I've been in contact with another mom who's daughter had to sleep in a swing for 2 months, she had bad night colic. Which I think is what Madilyn has. Pedro and I both try to comfort her at night but NOTHING works. That makes me feel like quite a bit of a failure but I know it has more to do with M's baby systems maturing than anything I'm doing or not doing.

I've read that colic can peak at 6 weeks and disappear by3 to 4 months. I'm still going to call the doctor tomorrow. Being awake for 8 hours at a stretch just doesn't seem right. Lily has been pretty good through all of this. When I break down crying she hugs me and tells me it's okay. Seriously, she deserves a pony. :)

Well, I just put M down for a nap. It's so funny how easy that is during the day. She sleeps happily in her crib. Oh well. I'm grateful for the wonderful baby I have and hopefully by the time fall rolls around, things will have calmed down somewhat. :)

Stressed

M had a bad night last night. She was awake from 1am until around 9am. I woke pedro up at 6 so I got a couple of hours of sleep. I'm more worried about her than i am about myself.

We did go to playgroup and that was kids non-stop yelling for over an hour. So that might have overstimulated her?

I tried to cuddle her this morning but when it didn't work, I put in an ear plug and tried to sleep. She doesn't cry. But she kicks and flails her arms around. I rule out the usual suspects but nothing seems to help. We might all just have to bite the bullet to try to get through the next couple of months.

Sigh.

And she doesn't do it every night, so it's hard to figure out what might be causing it. I know there were nights that I didn't get any sleep with Lily.

I wonder if I'm too hard on myself?

I worry about M sleeping too much during the day so she won't sleep at night. I think babies figure that out on their own in a couple of months. But I want everything perfect, right now!

Sigh.

Betterish

Well, Madilyn slept better last night. I still had to get up and feed her (duh) but she wasn't awake for long periods of time. I got some rest but for some reason I always feel more tired when I've had more sleep. It's like I become aware of how tired I am instead of running on empty.

Last night, Madilyn had trouble falling asleep and I was racking my brain trying to think of ways to calm her down. A shaky neuron fired and I remembered lullabies! Singing to her did indeed calm her down but the poor thing kept on startling herself every few seconds. It was weird and I think it's what keeps her up at night too. The doctor said something about it being neurological. ? She could be overstimulated but really, we don't do much round here.

I've been reading a lot of parenting newsgroups thingies and I just have to do my best and deal. Madilyn is only one month old and we're still figuring each other out. It's not like she doesn't have things to do. Just thinking about all that she has to learn tires me out. (Okay, I'm already tired). It's like Pedro says, just get through today. And then tomorrow? Just get through that too. Not a whole lot of fun but things will change soon.

Sigh

Last night was pretty rough, so excuse any typos. Madilyn had a shot and she was up all night fussing. Thankfully Pedro traded with me at 2am so i got a little sleep. Now I have to walk the line of letting M sleep to rest from last night and keeping her awake enough so she'll sleep tonight. Do not envy me. :P

Also, the house is stressful. I know having a child is big stress in life. Everyone has to adjust. My big thing right now is trying to get M to sleep when Pedro and Lily are running their mouths. I used some background noise last night but again I don't want to make the baby dependent on it. M does seem a little more sensitive, like me.

I tell people ad nauseum that I'm a delicate flower, but does anyone listen? DO THEY!?

achem

I'm going through this thing where I want M to grow up quickly so we can get past this stage. But then I remind myself. This is it. No more babies. So I'm kind of hurry up/slow down. I'm very glad that my new huge coffee maker is coming today.

The kicker is that Monday night, M slept a long time between feeds and I thought, hey, things are moving in the right direction.... *sigh*

Bruiser

Madilyn had her one month check up today. 8 lbs 12 ounces! woohoo She gained over a pound in 3 weeks. Go madi!

She also grew an inch and a half. It's funny to me because people say she looks so small but I can see the weight/length that she's gained. :)

Just think - by the end of August, she'll probably way 10 pounds. Which still isn't what Lily weighed, when SHE was born. :)

see more Lolcats and funny pictures




And covered in poop.

One month (yesterday)

I can't believe that Madilyn is one month old already. How did that happen? It's funny how much time feels like it's standing still, when I'm SO SO tired. But it just steams right on along. Not fair.

We're all pretty tired today. M didn't sleep so well, she was working so hard on getting gas out that her diaper leaked. Which is fine, I'm just glad that I checked instead of wondering why she couldn't sleep. It's so funny how parents get this checklist in their heads of all the things it could be keeping the baby awake. Wet diaper isn't too far down my list. :)

Madilyn does have more than one expression but it's hard to catch the other ones on "film". G-ma and g-pa came up for a visit yesterday. Unfortunately, Lily sort of freaked out and wouldn't go near them. Well, they got a lot of Madilyn time. :) We go to see the doctor tomorrow to see how much Madilyn weighs. She's been eating and sleeping well, so I think she'll be well over 8 pounds. Go M!

Bullet Post (cuz I feel like something new)

• Pedro and Lily are out on a hike.
• Madilyn still does not cry - the moms yesterday commented on how quiet she is. Yah!
• I am majorly impressed with how flat my stomach is less than a month after birth.
• I have lost all of my pregnancy weight + 1.
• I'm often so sleep deprived that I forget to eat.
  
• Daphne keeps pooping on the floor. She is about to meet her maker.
• My latest favorite cheesy show on Hulu: Merlin

Hard at Work

Daddy watched Madilyn last night. Unfortunately, Lily wasn't used to this turn of events and slept very fitfully beside me. And then Pedro came in at 5am and said that's it. I'm going to have to be more strict about what is considered night time. But I think we all (except Lily) got more sleep than usual. Pedro said that M keeps him up less than Lily does.

Also, I paid close attention to M a few nights ago. The formula change has helped in that she's no longer fussing so badly. But she's still awake, but yawning. So I moved the night light from our room into the adjoining bathroom. Huge difference. And I cuddle her as much as she needs to fall asleep. So instead of being awake 3 hours, she's only awake 1 and that includes eating.

I also work really really hard at keeping her up during the day. I'm not cruel or anything but I try to keep her up an hour or more every 3 hour feeding period. Sometimes that takes constant attention to her. Was that English?

Anyway, things are slowly working their way back to an even keel. At playgroup yesterday I asked the moms how much sleep they get. One admitted that she still hasn't slept through the night and she has two toddlers. ACK She says with all of the drink/potty requests she's always up at night. And another one said that her baby didn't sleep through the night until 8 months. CRAP!

So we'll see what happens.

In other news, I'm going to see Harry Potter tonight! wooooo!

Funny

I was thinking today about how tired I am (she may be sleeping better but she still eats at night) and how long it will take (probably) until M's sleeping longer stretches.

Then I remembered how fast babies grow. Even looking at pictures of Lily from 6 months ago, I'm amazed at the change. So yes, M will grow, I will get sleep, and then I'll miss having a little snuggly cuddly baby.

Because, really, you only have children to raise them and then watch them go off on their own. It's not like collecting china tea cups.

I'll have to start doing that again.

Better

Well, M was only up between 2:45 and 5:15 this morning. That's a lot better. :P Seriously, it is. Also, she wasn't as furious with her fussing so I snoozed along side of her. On the air mattress.

There was some confusion. The headboard I ordered is no longer being made so the delivery guys were waiting for word from the store if I wanted another headboard or what. So I said, please just send the mattress. Well, that instruction got to the delivery guys too late and the truck was already full. SO, I get a $100 sorry-we-screwed-up refund and hopefully my bed will be here tomorrow. It's been interesting dealing with a fussy baby and a nomadic bed situation. But we're all doing our best.

Oh and M is doing better on the different formula. She just seems more relaxed over all. She's still gassy but it just fires right on out without her throwing her legs in the air. :) I can't believe the things that one considers appropriate conversation when one is a parent.

Dying

Well, I've been in contact with the doctor's office a few times but they only suggest that I try to keep M awake more during the day. I've been doing that successfully. It doesn't help that I watch her yawn and try to fall asleep at night only to kick her legs and fuss. I don't know why no one's listening to me.

I'm waiting for the bed delivery peeps to call and then I'm going to call my doctor and set up an appointment. Or just go out and get formula for gas. Cuz this is ridiculous. I got more sleep than M (3 hours) because I put in ear plugs and slept. I couldn't take it. So I know she really feels exhausted.

Help.

It's a Swing Thing

Wow. It's been one very long day. We spent over 5 hours out shopping today. Yes, with Madilyn and Lily in tow. I ordered a new bed and should get it Tuesday. Some night this week, as I felt my vertebrae grinding their way out of position, I decided it was TIME. It was sort of ruined when I was pregnant with Lily and just died slowly from there.

Anyway, yes, I had some sleep last night. Lily and I were up for about 2 hours, and I did put her in the swing. I think she slept in it for a few hours. And no, it wasn't on. Then I took her to bed after she fed at 6:15 and she slept until 9:15. WOOOO She was actually awake quite a bit today too. Small wonder after finally getting some sleep. :)

I can't wait for Monday though. She may have night-time colic. There are formulas for that and I'm dying to put her on one. How nice it would be for her to sleep more at night and then be more awake during the day. *dreamy sigh* You know, I knew I would be tired, after all you have to feed baby at night, but it's usually a get up and feed them and then lay down. It's not a get up and feed them, cuddle them when they get upset, try to lay them down, pick them back up again, wonder if they're hungry, get them some food, then clean up some vomit, then cuddle them some more, then finally fall asleep after baby collapses from exhaustion. You know?

Boo

I called the doctor's office today because M was up again for HOURS. I'd get her to sleep in my arms and then 10 minutes after laying her flat, she's fuss back up again. Arms flailing, legs kicking. Again, she's not a crier so it's hard to tell what's going on. But the nurse thinks she might have colic. So we're going to try a few things over the weekend. If they don't work then we might have to switch up formulas. I had the feeling that what was going on, wasn't normal. But you know, we all have to figure each other out.

M was awake from 12am til 2am, then 4:30am to 8:45. Poor thing is exhausted. Not to mention Pedro and I.

Gas

Might be what's keeping Madilyn up at a night. She was awake off and on from 10 last night until 3 this morning. I couldn't take it anymore and asked Pedro for help. He proudly boasted that he got her to sleep quickly after a feed and some "big farts". So that made me wonder. Madilyn doesn't really cry. She pulls her legs up and fusses but I wasn't sure if that was her partying or not. I have some gas drops that I can use for her. Maybe after her last feeding tonight. See if that helps.

I was a wreck this morning. I mean REALLY. I had one of those nights where I just questioned everything. Did I make a mistake having kid #2? Is it fair to Lily or any of us? A new baby is a big change and a stressful one. I kind of forgot about that. Lily has been pretty awesome though. She still maintains that M is her baby. Hey, that's a lot better than trying to hit her.

In other news, Madilyn had her first bath last night. She did pretty well but then she doesn't cry so... Isn't that weird? Lily didn't cry a lot but I do remember it. Pedro and I would snap at each other trying to figure out what was wrong with her and trying to fix it. So, it is less stressful in some respects having a baby that's so calm. But frustrating because when she doesn't cry, I think nothing's wrong with her. Did that make sense?

Anyway, I'm still stressing about how to take care of Madilyn. I did read in one of my books that it takes most babies up to 3 months before they really sleep through the night. I'd be happy with her just not partying at night. I don't care if I'm woken up for a feed but being kept up for 5 and a half hours? Holy crap. No one can take that and try to function the next day. I wanted to shake her and ask her what the hell was wrong. That's why I went to get Pedro. Hey, I'm human. And not that I don't want her, or love her, or enjoy her, but holy smokes, can I handle doing the baby thing again?

Oh wow

I had a cute post (in my head) ready to go and unfortunately disaster, in the form of a sleepless baby, struck. Bear with me, I've been up since 4am. I'm torn between just getting M to sleep so that I can sleep and teaching her to fall asleep on her own. Pedro and I had a talk and we agreed that it makes the most sense to get her to sleep however right now, so that I can get some sleep. Once she can sleep longer stretches I'll work on settling her down so she can finish falling asleep on her own.

She is a very feisty wee baby. I swaddle her up like she's in a straight jacket but she will twist and kick until she gets out. She couldn't fall asleep last night either, I had to use the baby swing. I feel bad because I don't want her to rely on something like that to get to sleep. On the other hand, I need sleep, she needs sleep and obviously they make those things for a reason. So I don't really know what to do. Well, I guess I do. Get baby to sleep so that mommy can sleep and damn the torpedoes.

Important News: M had a doctor's appointment yesterday and she now weighs 7lbs 9oz so she's gained some respectable weight. She's starting to stay awake more now during the day, almost equal parts awake and asleep. Awesome. She's also starting to go longer stretches at night between feeds. Also, awesome. The only drag is that she now seems to not be able to fall asleep. Which is weird because she was such a good sleeper at first... ? Maybe she's more developed and so more interested in the world around her?

I wanted to get Lily a present for being so helpful and for putting up with me. :) Fortunately, CVS has a small toy section. Since Lily loves Sleeping Beauty, I went with some princess stuff. She LOVES it. Or them. She made me take off her pajama top because it clashed with her jewelry. *rolling eyes* Then we went and put on a party dress, with party shoes so she could complete her ensemble. Seriously. Y'all have no idea. Yes, she's happy to play for hours in the sandbox but give her a chance to dress up and she becomes a diva. She was hounding her daddy for her Hello Kitty makeup kit so that she could put on some lip gloss. But that kit has found another, well hidden, home. :)

In other news, Daphne wiped a poop all over the livingroom floor, and I broke a pyrex measuring cup in the kitchen. So it's been a fun clean up day today. In other, other news, I got some more Lindt chocolates - the cookies and cream ones. :)

Today was a good day

Although, shortly after posting how quiet everything was, something brown hit the fan. M threw up, Lily tore apart the sofa. Oh, Pedro was still sleeping soundly, not to worry. I'm looking forward to that doc's appointment tomorrow. Just for some answers. Not because I like the doctor's office. :P Anyway, for some reason (and there's always a reason) Miss Lily was crying.

I think I may have given birth to a reincarnated gangsta. She's been waking up more and more during the day. As long as we feed her slowly and keep her upright, she doesn't seem to spit up as much. She did roll over this morning. Right onto her belly. I tried to tell her that 15 day old babies don't do that. I'm not going to get a break with her. I remember with Lily there were at least a few months where I could put her down and be fully confident she would be right where I left her. I don't have that with M. That's okay, it just means I'll have to tell everyone who watches her not to leave her anyplace that she could roll off of....

And this is grumpy face when she's awake. That's a great picture, right? She is actually the easiest baby to care for - barfing excluded. I think Pedro has figured out that it's easier to watch M than L. :)

Quiet Time

Pedro & Madilyn are asleep. Lily and I are about to head out to get our Sunday papers. I'm still not getting a lot of sleep. Pedro had insomnia so I gave a wide awake M to him at 2 in the morning. Unfortunately, he woke me up at 3:30 after she barfed. He fed her, right after I fed her. We're still figuring out her cues. I knew she had just eaten, but P didn't. We'll get there.

M is starting to wake up more predictably. No more 5 or 6 hour naps. I remember that it took quite a few weeks to get Lily to sleep longer through the night. They just don't have big tummies when they're first born. At least with M starting more of a routine, I might be able to get a couple of more naps during the week. :)

I hope everyone enjoyed the 4th. I got some cleaning done. :)

Diabolical

That's just the first word that popped in my head. :) We had an okay day today. M kept me up again last night. She slept 6 hours in the afternoon. Now, I try to wake her up. I do everything that I know to do and zzzzzz. I'll just keep on trying. And she's thrown up two nights in a row. I think it's nipple issues. She's getting too much food too fast. You wouldn't know it by how slowly sleepy face eats. And I took M on the scale with me at home. My scale (after some tricky subtraction) shows her weighing 7.6lbs. Now, I know that my scale isn't perfect but jeesh. I don't have much faith in the one at the doc's office either!

Pedro and Lily are off on a biking adventure around the lake. I know that Pedro can do it by himself, but with Lily he's dragging 40+lbs. I've got Koolaid made and well, he said he'd cook dinner so that's on him. :P We went grocery shopping as a family today. I put M in the baby wrap. Which also supported the bottle, so she fed and I had both hands free. :) It was still difficult to concentrate. Trying to organize coupons and the baby and keep my coffee from spilling. It was a lot to ask of myself.

I ran into the OB that delivered Madilyn, while we were at the grocery store. She was amazed, like everyone else, that I was out after only two weeks. I told her that I wondered if it was because I have babies so quickly. I mean, labor never wants to start but once it's time to push, SHAZAM!, the baby's out. Imagine pushing and grunting and whatnot for hours! That might cause a little more, I don't know, aches, pains....strains? But it's been making me question myself. I try to focus in on my body. Does it really hurt and I'm just not noticing? I didn't really notice with Lily either. But then I was SUPER sleep deprived. Maybe I'm just super awesome. lol

Well, I've stayed up in case Pedro needed me to come and get him and Lily but I need to rest a bit. Hope everyone enjoys their holiday weekend!

Weird

I've been trying to feed Madilyn more since she has to go in for a weighing on Monday. And I have to deal with the doctor I don't like. Pedro and I were talking about getting Madilyn some premie formula to help fatten her up. She doesn't wake up. The only good part about that is that she can eat in her sleep. Really. I got her to eat 3.5 ounces between 6 and 7. She never opened her eyes. And some babies are just sleepier than other babies.

Pedro had today off so I actually had a nap this afternoon. Only an hour but when you're sleep deprived an hour feels like a million bucks.

Pedro and Lily are off at the playground. He got the bike trailer for Lily today and off they went. It was pretty cute. :)

Also, when they aren't here I seem to get a lot of stuff done. I've been really successful lately in clearing out, or finding places for, clutter. It's been a nice feeling.:)

Anyway, no new pictures of baby. All she does is sleep and I need to put in fresh batteries in the camera.

Wow

Lily is eating her fried egg with a knife and fork (sort of) and drinking milk out of a glass. A glass she stole from me, but still. Wow. She saw me eating an egg and wanted one of her own, so she got it out of the fridge and showed it to me, still intact. whew

I'm really proud of her (not the egg and milk stealing part). And I'm really sleepy, so that's all.