Be my Crankenstein

I am a grouchy muppet today.  I know part of it is PMS.  Please tell me that goes away with menopause?  Or just lie.  Whatevs.

I bloat.  I mean, REALLY bloat.  I went to the gym today in kind of a tight outfit which I normally don't care about because it's old people there.  So why the hell was the gym full of muscly guys today?  The one day my boobs and butt are competing for prominence?  *eyes*  Sigh.  I'll go back later with Pedro.  I skulked out after hiding in a corner.  Good grief.  I mean, no one I know said anything so it probably wasn't that bad but I was freaking out. 

Freaking out.

*eye roll*

At least I'm good and drinking a banana strawberry smoothie.  And none of that frozen shit with all the additives.  Just bananas, orange juice, strawberries and raw almonds. 

Sigh. 

I had stuff to post and you 'd think I could remember.  Great day.

Anyway, it's very dangerous to eat half a banana bread loaf and two cups of raw sugar snaps.  Ooooh I could've put sugar snaps in my smoothie!  Damn.  Now I want sugar snaps.

mmmm nom nom

Okay, so.  After having kids my butt was FLAT.  I'm built very up and down-y so if pants are going to be tight it will be at the waist.  Well, not any more, sister!  They are tight around the butt now too.  My trainer got me started doing squats and lunges on the smith machine.  Holy crap.  So momma has a bedonkadonk.  And I've worked hard for it.  I just wasn't in the mood for it to be up in everyone's face today. 

Okay, so enough about my butt.  I need more sugar snaps. 

Madi is doing well.  She's talking and participating more AT SCHOOL.  We don't see a lot of new stuff at home.  Although, yesterday, she squished me and I said "ow" so then she picked something up and hit me in the head with it to make me say "ow" again.  Is that progress?  I guess.  Pedro bonked her on the head with something (soft!) and she yelled at him "Baaaaaad!"  So I guess that's good too.  You have to understand I want to be able to communicate with her.  I want her to tell me when she needs to go potty or if she's hungry.  Instead of smashing lamps and pulling her hair out.

Oh yeah.  Both of those things.  Every day.  She's broken two of my iPad docking thingies.  Lifts them up over her head and smashes them on my dresser.  Did I birth Baby Jane or what? 

Alright, Brewster is fussing.  He's taken to howling when I don't do anything when he barks.  That's fabulous, let me tell you.